Lots of people aim to make changes in January.
But, is it the best time for resolutions or reinventions i wonder.
(image by Luisamohle)
Out my window, nature is still dormant. Quite happy in it's stillness as if contemplating and dreaming. Life there is not taking action or forcing growth forwards. Not yet, at least. The conditions are not right and nature knows it.
If we tune into our own rhythms, what are they saying?
what are they telling us to wait for, or put in place during this winter season before changes can come along more easily.. ( if you live in the Southern hemisphere chances are your rythmns will be different and you will be in a different space)
Maybe we need to just relax after Christmas. Allow a little space to breathe.
As far as goal setting or attaining goes... we can tend to want to want to stick to rules or regimented ideas of what we feel we should be doing. Sometimes these ideals are based on what other people say we should be like.
Then in pursuit of this ideal way of feeling, we seek to reach the goal, and complete it as quickly as possible, Maybe to feel happier, or to feel good about ourselves, to increase our self worth through accomplishing something.
But life doesn't always work out like that,
"Life tends, more often than not, to be what is happening while we're busy making those plans"
Across the course of a year, things can change, we may need to bend and ebb and flow with how things go. Do we feel ok with that, can we be flexible?
And if we fail to meet our goals, how will we feel?
Will our happiness depend on them, will our worth depend on them? and even if our first answer to this is no, how will we really feel in the parts of ourselves that lie deeper, quieter, and perhaps are a little more sensitive to having let us down.
Goal setting as a motivation is helpful. The problems arise with how we feel if they arent held to, or attained. We need to be careful that we don't take it as meaning WE are failures, if we fail to achieve what we aimed for.
Accomplishment is fulfilling. Depending on achievements, to enable us to feel self worth, is far less benefitial.
We need to have self worth, and a sense of being good enough, and loved, just for who we are, not have it depend on what we do, or how much we achieve.
by Emma del Rey
Baring these reflections in mind, i find if i look at the year ahead, i am more tempted to just live in the present. To keep a certain idea of hopes and dreams, to have my visulisation boards, but to not make lists, and to feel no pressure of "i should be's" and just be open and kind to myself.